My Real Shower Thoughts, or why I never post to #justshowerthoughts

image: Tina Urso McDaniel 2017

1. Did I rinse out my conditioner? yeah, I think I did... no, wait... still there...
2. Is this the soap I’m allergic to? I can never remember which one.
3. Wow! Everything looks so clear today... oh riiiight-- glasses.
4. Why do other people get thoughts in here? Not enough free time I guess.
5. Did I remember to lock the door? Of course I did, of course I did.
6. We’re fine, we’re FINE; don’t let yourself be victimized by a stupid scene thought up by a Freudian misogynist with mother issues. Do NOT be victimized by the patriarchy... Will NOT... NO... Do NOT... breathe... BREEEATHE... Ok... fine now.
7. Hey, remember to throw that old bandaid out.
8. Ahhh... warm water, good.
9. Hey, we’re running late here... hurry up, man!
10. Is this my towel?